| Reinvetion and prediction |
[Nov. 17th, 2008|09:01 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | In my own head. | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  weird | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Lordi - Blood Red Sandman | ] |
Well, I have been a little lazy with this but it's for a good reason this time. I have been trying to reinvent myself lately, or at least come up with a plan to reinvent myself. I dunno what happened to me...all of a sudden it was like *bam* and a lot of things changed. I don't want to go into a great amount of details over what is going on but suffice it to say that the management(brain) has decreed that changes will be taking place in the way things are run in my life.
So far things are going smoother than I anticipated, and it is kinda encouraging and scary at the same time. I mean, if PHASE 1 is a success that means I must move ahead to ... PHASE 2 ... *shudder* ... and that means getting over a particularly large fear for me. I know all this vagueness is not cool and I wish I could let you all into my head so that I could explain it better without words getting in the way, but for now I need to get my head wrapped around what is going on and really make the commitment before I bring anyone else into my madness.
Heh, I dunno maybe I just hit my mid-life crisis about a decade and a half too early. :-p
Let it also be written in stone that by the middle of next year I will make a post here ... and it will BLOW YOUR MINDS! |
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| And then there was four.... |
[Sep. 26th, 2008|10:04 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  scared | ] |
So I had an installation in the ass-end of nowhere. I mean seriously, think of going up a 45 degree hill while what you are driving on is not a road, but a seismic readout and you might get the picture.
Anyway, the funny part is that this area of the island is known for having a lot of "Alien Sightings". Well, I can safely say that I freaking know why after driving up there. It's not hard to imagine that some otherworldly force is behind the horrible roads, and weird architecture up there. Plus, add to that the ability to see people just standing on the road, miles from any houses of civilization with no cars, no means of transportation whatsoever, and they just stare at you like a deer caught in the headlight while standing in the MIDDLE OF THE FREAKING ROAD AND NOT MOVING!!!!!
I swear alien zombies live among us people. I mean, they got my boss on the way up there and lobotomized him. It's the only explanation I have for the fact that when I got to the town and could not find the place that I was supposed to be installing at I called him and had the following conversation:
Me: Hello sir, I think I am kind of lost. I got to the town ok but I can't seem to find Supermarket A (name withheld to prevent the suing of me by someone else....maybe). I am the main street of the town and have just passed Supermarket B going South.
Boss: No, Supermarket B is not the place you are going to be installing.
Me: Um...yes I know that, I just wanted to give you a point of reference so you can give me directions from there. TRANSLATION: "NO SHIT, OLD MAN!!!! After you are done identifying the obvious tell me how to fucking get to the damn store!"
Boss: Ok, go back down the street you are on (one way street going away from where he is sending me by the way) and you will see a gas station on your left....I think it's your left. Anyway, the station is a Shell gas station, and there you make a left. Yeah, I think it's a Shell gas station, make a left there. Yeah, I think it's a left.
Me: Ok then, I will look for the gas station and make a left there. TRANSLATION: "Sweet lord I'm ready! Take me now!"
The boss then proceeds to give me a 5 minute history lesson on why Supermarket B is not the place I need to go install because it is owned by a different owner, while Supermarket A is owned by another guy. I proceed to try to give hints as to the fact that I need to hang up to concentrate on the road, but they are ignored.
Miraculously I did find a gas station....and miraculously it was a Shell gas station. However, as I made the left I ended up outside the outskirts of the town looking up a 65 degree hill and basically said: "Um....no." So I went back and made a right at the gas station...again, no luck.
So, now with my belief that my boss is an idiot and should ultimately be electroshocked for his own good reaffirmed, I set out to find the supermarket by doing what I should have done in the first place, driving randomly down streets till I saw people carrying shopping bags.
And so began the 12 hour hell of getting this supermarket installed with 3 new registers. It is truly a tale that will chill the marrow of the hardiest of technical support personnel, and would make a programmer like myself flee in terror and commit seppuku were I sane and awake enough to know what was good for me. |
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| Three in a row! |
[Sep. 25th, 2008|09:00 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  thoughtful | ] |
Well...here comes day three of the bi-yearly updateathon.
Well, the government decided to extend "Tax Free Day" till Friday, which makes me oh so happy.....*shakes fist at no one in particular* As you can probably guess everyone is still calling me to update their tax definitions on their registers.
On top of everything else I got a call right as I was getting home from work that this lady somehow lost $1000 in transactions and can't find them in the system. Now, let me ask you, how do you lose that many transactions when the system does not lose transactions in the first place?! Also, why do you call me when I am home and can not help you because I can not connect to your store and look at your logs to tell you that you are an idiot and are looking in the wrong place?!?!
Anyway, enough of me venting over stupid people. After all, if I did that all day I would probably be done in like, oh i dunno, 30-bajillion years. Anyway on to more edifying and interesting conversation: "What superpower would you have if you were on the TV show Heroes?". Well I thought long and hard about this one, after all I wanted to be original yet not overpowered, but still have a super power that would keep me from dying in a pinch. I went through most silly and dumb ideas in my head and finally decided on *drum roll* LETHARGY!
Seriously, I would like the power to make everyone in a 50' radius of me so tired and lazy that they won't wanna do anything but sit down and watch TV, even if there is no TV. Think about it, I would never have to fear getting killed so long as people had to come within my area of effect to kill me. Plus, it saved me the trouble of having to actively run away / fight / clean up after killing people. So what are your thoughts? |
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| Weirdness Day |
[Sep. 24th, 2008|08:12 pm] |
Well, this is a first I think...two posts in two days. Heh, guess this one was just too good to pass up. So the government here decides that in order to boost the current governor's approval ratings for the upcoming election, they are going to declare today to be a "Tax Free" day. So basically everything you buy today on the island will be tax free. This is without a doubt the dumbest idea I have ever heard.
I mean, did they not consider what a huge change some store owners would have to make to their current POS software to take the tax off of every sale just for today? I mean, I had like 20 calls this morning about this very thing.
So, as I pondered the governor's strategy of making people like him by giving them the finger, I was then confronted by another weird event. See, I have been trying to help a friend of mine organize a CCG event for Legend of the Five Rings here in PR for a little bit and we were trying to get a venue. We wanted something close to the airport so that anyone who feels like flying in for it won't need to go very far.
So we went to check out this hotel in the area around the airport. Upon arrival we asked at the front desk who we could talk to regarding renting a ballroom for one day and they promptly sent us over to their catering department. We talked to this really nice woman there and explained our situation and needs, and she told us that the hotel's policy was that any card tournament needed the approval of the casino director. We found this kind of strange and asked her why we needed casino approval for a CCG tournament where there was no betting taking place, but she told us that we needed to talk to the casino guy anyway. So off we go to the casino guy.
After the usual greetings we explained our situation and told him that the catering girl had sent us to him because of the hotel's policy regarding card games. He looked at us like we were speaking Chinese, and told us that there was no such policy as far as he was concerned. The only time that we would need to go through him would be if we were holding a tournament where betting was going to take place. This of course made perfect sense to me. So, after some discussion about what the heck might have happened to cause the error, he put us in touch with catering again.....
So after explaining our needs to the head of the catering department we finally got a quote on the room. Now, I am pretty open minded guy, but when I saw the quote I swear I almost keeled over in pain. It seriously felt like someone kicked me in the groin at that moment. What was more amazing was that if we wanted to do the event on a weekday or a Sunday, the price was 1/3 of what it was for a Saturday.
Anyway, so we left the hotel and decided to eat at the Pizza Hut that was nearby. We had a fun dinner and some lively debate about what super powers we would want to have (yeah blame Heroes for this). After we left we were approached by a guy who gave us a paper promoting a youth basketball organization that had a tournament coming up and then proceeded to give us a two-minute spiel about their organization that ended with can you donate anything to our cause. So I gave the guy a buck and he then asked me if he could have his flier back. I sorta looked at him funny for a second, as I have never had anyone give me an informational flier and then take it back from me, especially when he was carrying a stack of like 100 of them, but I shrugged my shoulders and passed it back to him.
So to make a long story short (too late, I know): it has been a really really weird day for me. |
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| Almost but not quite.... |
[Sep. 23rd, 2008|07:51 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | weird | ] |
Well, it's been almost a year since my last post. Lots of weird stuff has happened at work...too much for me to really focus on if I want to keep my sanity. Other than that I guess things are cool. Broke up with my GF which kinda sucks, but it was a casual relationship anyways so I was not too down about it. Mostly I just miss the sex (typical guy I know :-p). Seriously I am surprised it lasted as long as it did since we really were not that compatible, what with me being a huge nerd and her not being one at all. Sometimes all you can say is flerg :-p
Other than that things are cool. Sitting, staring, computing my heart away as usual. Finding new and interesting ways to waste time at work now that it has become a vast wasteland of nothing. Seriously sometimes all I do all day is surf the internet because I have no projects pending, and my boss is sorta not motivated to do anything. Well, least we no longer have the "Bitch queen of the universe" around to give us mindless busywork only to change her mind 4 hours later and have us do something more menial and useless. Sorry if this makes no sense but if you guys really want to know about it just let me know and I will post in all its horrifying detail. For now though I will give you a preview, it's like getting a root canal, a prostate exam, and a vasectomy all at the same time...and I have never had any one of those performed on me.
Anyway, I will leave you all with the following tidbit from my insanity archives:
Marketing Rep: Hey Rob, do either you or Angel (guy who sits in the desk next to me) know what a 3.5 density diskette is?
[Angel and I share a look that basically says: "Um she is asking us for a floppy disk right?"]
Me: Yes....do you need one?
Marketing Rep: YOU HAVE ONE?!?!?! (Seriously, she screamed at me and everything.)
Me: Um...yeah. Here you go. [Gave her a floppy]
Marketing Rep: This is it?!
Me: Yes.
[Marketing Rep stomps off and goes into my manager's office. She comes out 5 minutes later.]
Marketing Rep: The manager says you guys don't know what the hell you're talking about because obviously the disk says that it is 1.44.
[Angel and I keel over and die...come back to life as brainless zombies and can do no more productive work for the rest of the day.] |
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| Good Jeorb |
[Oct. 31st, 2006|06:04 pm] |
Well, looks like this site will not become a repository for the insane things that more and more often have found a way to bore inside my skull and set up shop. For all my readers, yeah I'm talking to you Shadowdream :-p, I hope your sanity levels have been checked within the last 2-3 months, for I am about to unload a mass of insanity causing hysteria that will either have you fleeing from the room or thanking the gods that at least you had chicken. So anyways look for my next update sometime soon to see what's getting my goat....come back with that goat you stinking kids!
PS. Let me just leave you with this question. If your printer caught fire, how long would you wait to unplug it. Answer: 5 minutes. This is taken from an actual live call I was involved in.
Customer <-- Dumbass: Hi, I am having a problem with my printer.
Me <-- Bigger dumbass for not seeing this coming: What seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well it started giving off sparks and smoke started coming out of it.
Me: Sounds like there is a short somewhere, I will send a field rep over to your location to fix the printer.
Customer: So what should I do with the printer?
Me: Well just put it somewhere so that the tech can find it when he gets there.
Customer: Ok, but should I turn it off cuz it caught fire like five minutes ago and I am afraid it will set off the sprinklers.
Me: (Stunned silence)
Customer: Hello?
Me: Yeah, turning it off would be a good idea.
Customer: Ok thanks!
Me <-- Hoping he got electrocuted. |
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| Not dead yet... |
[Oct. 26th, 2006|06:25 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hungry | ] |
To anyone who still reads this. Reports of my demise have been for the most part accurate. I am happy to report that I am now some sort of undead monkey, and will henceforth answer to the name of "The Flamingo". Please be sure to keep all easily chewed body parts out of reach, as they will be nibbled upon quite furiously. Oh, and for the people in the front row, you will get glomped. |
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| Two in one month...something must be wrong with me... |
[Mar. 18th, 2005|10:08 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Helicopter Blades | ] |
Hey all of the two people who read this. Well, just figured I would write a quick posting before I go read my book and go to bed.
Looks like I will be heading back home to PR the week after easter. I am not too sure what my feelings are about that yet. There is a lot of stuff to sort though there. Still, it is the first time I will be home in over 2 years almost, so for now I am focusing on that. It is gonna suck hard to leave all the friends I have here in Harrisburg behind, and I know that they are not really happy to see me go. However, we will be doing one last hoorah before I do leave on the weekend of easter. Gonna be going up to my old stomping grounds in Binghamton NY and having one last basket of the best wings in the world, and then heading on down the Tzers to get stocked up on my daily allotment of boobage. ;-)
Anyway, for all my friends out there in cyberland, be sure and say a quick prayer for the ol Rob in his future endeavors. Who knows, maybe I shall be staging my triumphant return to the states in a couple of years, and there will be much rejoicing. |
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| I'm so bad at this |
[Mar. 14th, 2005|08:11 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | contemplative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Computor Fan | ] |
Well, after months of down time I have managed to get the urge to update this thing again. I know I am really bad at this, but then again I think about 2 people read this anyway and they are casual readers at that. Still, I guess that I should let everyone know what is currently up with me and my crazy life.
Ever find out something about someone you cared deeply about that they never even bothered to tell you? Well that seems to be the new thing of the day for me. I just got done talking with an old friend and lover that I had not seen in quite some time and the conversation went a little something like this: "Hey! How you been? I got married on Valentines Day and am expecting my first kid in about a month!" Now, cut to me looking confused...for like 3 hours. Now, for those of you that are like me and never really get over the people you shared a bed with, you know that there was a little twinge of jealousy when I heard all of this. Still, that was a long time ago and I am really happy for her and her new guy, which is a really cool guy once I met him. Still, it stings that she didn't bother to tell me about him in all of the 2 years they were dating. Oh well, maybe I am being a little kooky about this whole thing but it sorta took me by surprise and all.
Ok, next on the list is a shocker from another one of my old friends from back in high school. Just found out that he was gay. Now, that really does not bother me at all and to be honest I kinda sorta suspected it for a long time. No, the shocker is that he is seeing a former boss of his and that he has basically broken up the man's marriage to his wife of 10 years. Again, cue to me looking very confused....for about a day. Still, I am happy that he seems to have found someone that makes him happy.
Oh no, but the parade of weirdness continues. So today I was feeling kinda nostalgic and looking into some of my old cyber hang outs from my early college days and find that many of them don't exist anymore. Well, I guess you can insert something here about how times change and things never stay the same or whatever but I really feel like a piece of me is gone now, and I can't get it back. Still, that is not so much a tragedy as something that makes you sigh wistfully for a second while remembering all the good times and the bad times that were spent in those places. Almost feels like coming back to your home town and seeing your a place you played in as a kid bulldozed for a strip mall or something. The interesting thing is that this was never a real "place." Just a little piece of cyber property where some people would get together and hang out. Guess I just get attached to things easily.
Anyway I got one more story about something coming out of the blue but I don't think I will tell it here. I just find it weird that we don't share all of who we really are with those we profess to love. Guess that's why in the end things don't work out and all that is left is a nice picture to put up in the walls of your mind so that one day you happen to glance that way and see it you can sigh wistfully for a moment and wonder what might have been.
Here's to collecting many more pictures. :) |
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| That special time of year... |
[Dec. 23rd, 2003|08:06 pm] |
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Ah...well it's that time of the year again. The air is colder and there seems to be an unusual amount of x-mas music playing in the malls. Sigh, the more I think about it the more I realize that christmas is rapidly becoming just another day to me. I remember when I was younger and being all excited that I just could not sleep, you know what with the presents and all. Lately tho I am just not in the spirit of the holidays. I swear if Tony would not have told me that there were only 2 days left before Dec. 25th I would probably not have noticed. The real sad part is that I find that I don't really care about not caring about the holidays...if that makes any sense at all. It does not really bother me that everyone else is making such a big deal about it, I feel happy for them. At the same time tho, I am quite blah about the whole thing. Oh well, guess we all have to grow up sometime and lose that special sense of wonder. |
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| A new home... |
[Dec. 8th, 2003|09:57 pm] |
Well, I know I really haven't updated this in a long time and no one reads it but I guess I should really put down some of what has happened in the last couple of months down.
For one I ended up moving out of my old cozy apt in Binghamton, NY and am now living in Middletown, PA with my friend Tony. Mostly this came about due to the fact that it has been a hell of a time to find a job ever since I finished grad school. I have been looking since about mid Jan and there is still nothing on the horizon. So, once my lease in Binghamton was up for renewal I was kinda informed that I would not be able to renew it, and was left with about 1 month to try and secure new housing. This was right before the semester started and most off campus housing within my price range was already taken. While I will not go into what was wrong with some of the other places that were left the word "crap-hole" took on a whole new meaning for me. I swear if any of you people that don't read this get that joke I will have to reward you with a cookie or something.
Anyway, I had pretty much resigned myself to having to move back in with my parents...a prospect that confirmed that my life was right on track to the gutter, like I planed. However, I decided to ask my friend Tony if I could possibly crash at his place till I made arrangements to go back home.
Once I got here, however, Tony and I just liked hanging out so much that we decided to keep being roomies. Kinda takes us back to the days when I was in college and Tony and I would hang out all the time and just make fun of whatever was on TV at the moment.
As for a job that still has not changed at all. I swear that things should be easier once you finally get your master's degree. Still it could be a lot worse, and I think I can be content with living in the now. After all, it can't rain every day. |
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| Back in action... |
[Apr. 17th, 2003|01:41 pm] |
Well, it's been a while since I posted here so I figgured I should give you all more news from the void that is the world of Rob. that's right, it's Rob Action News at 11!
In our first story the Rob's friend Val may soon find himself out of work. While details on why have been sketchy as Val has refused repeated requests for interviews, it appears that the company currently employing Val is going out of business. In fact it has been confirmed that Val has already begun exploring other opportunities.
Our next story deals with another of the Rob's friends, Kulpy. Recently the Rob paid a visit to his friend Kulpy in the lovely local of Allentown. However, a routine breakfast meeting soon turned to a shocking situation when Kulpy revealed that he did not believe that he had enough experience to look for a better job. Now, Kulpy has been working at the same place since 1999, and has continuously shown his value to the local TV station where he works. When questioned about his apparent lack of confidence in his abilities, Kulpy merely replied that he had enough experience in one or two things, but that his experience was not going to cut it in a bigger station. When the Rob heard this he proceeded to smack Kulpy upside the head and inform him that if he did not get off his butt and look for a better job soon the Rob would have to layeth the smacketh downeth on his candy ass. Being a wrestling fan, Kulpy immediately got the message and agreed to look for a better job.
And that concludes the first installment of Rob Action News at 11. I hope you have enjoyed our show and we look forward to you tuning in to our program in the future. |
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| Sigh... |
[Apr. 2nd, 2003|09:17 pm] |
Well, I haven't updated this thing in a while so I guess now is as good a time as any. First off let me begin by saying that job hunting sucks in more ways that I ever thought imaginable. That said, I guess this week has been pretty good in all other respects. I got to take a trip down to Allentown this weekend to visit an old friend from college. It was only a two hour drive, but thanks to the evil return of winter weather, the drive back was an ordeal I would not care to repeat. I set out of Allentown at about 12am and maybe 20 min into the drive the turnpike got so icy that i could actually feel the car sliding left and right just a little. So I was restricted to a snail's pace if I didn't want to die. Thankfully I tucked in behind a snow plow laying down salt and was able to make some good time. So after all was said and done i got home at about 3am and promptly passed into sweet oblivion.
Other than that my sanity has been maintained by my weekly trips to "wing nite." It has sadly become one of my only outlets for conversation with other people. I mean, talking to the walls is entertaining but after about a week or so you have heard all of its stories and it has heard all of your's :p. Anyway, I guess that is about the most exciting things that have happened to me since I posted last, which is so depressing I think I am gonna go curl up into a ball and go to sleep till the day is over :-|. Nite all! |
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